sad + happy = SADAPPY

Human psychology and behavior is predictably irrational or can be rationally predicted. I noticed an unusual behavior that sometimes people chose to be Sad because feeling sad makes them Happy. This is unusual for me, a guy to understand why someone would choose to be sad but apparently two of my friends (whom are female) agree with behavior.

They shared that sometimes they like to be sad and choose to be sad especially at night and being sad gives them some sort of unusual pleasure.

Does this provides us a glimpse into human behavior and actions sheds light on why when some people still want to focus on what is wrong in their lives rather that what is right. Because maybe on some level being sad gives them conscious/subconscious happiness

So is there a new emotion, where being sad makes you happy, thus SADAPPY?

Tom told me today, “Sometimes, I think my wife loves her dog, Snuggles, much more than she loves me.”

My friend, lets call him Tom, made a statement today, “Sometimes, I think my wife loves her dog, Snuggles, much more than she loves me.” I have been contemplating over that statement and pondered why that is. The more I thought, the more it became clear, why people love their pets, especially Dogs unconditionally because the Dog loves his owner unconditionally.

What does a Dog do, when he see’s his owner coming?
He stops whatever he is doing and looks towards his owner, even if the owner is far way. Then he leaves everything behind and runs towards the owner to greet him/her. The dog jumps on her, hugs her while wagging his tail and shows her how excited he is that she is home. He looks at her with nothing but love in his eyes, making her realize that he is just happy that she is back. He dances around in joy and follows her around the house and when she is sitting, he puts his head in her lap and lays there without asking for anything except an occasional touch of her hand.

When was the last time Tom did that for his wife; greeted her with undivided attention when she came back from work. When last time he asked his wife how was her day and brought her a cup of coffee as she returned from work or even had dinner ready for her as she arrived home.

So, what can a dog teach us about Public Relations and/or Human Relations?

• Give her your undivided attention.
• When you see her coming from a distance, get up, go there to greet her.
• SMILE big, show all your teeth.
• Ask her how was her day and just SHUTUP and listen without comments or advice.

My advice to Tom, do these 4 things and I guarantee your wife will love you more than the dog.

Homeless People: Could they be part of your next Marketing Campaign?

Here’s an idea for being philanthropic this season and also promoting your business.
Rather than printing T-shirts and having your employees wear those as advertising why not give out those T-Shirts/Jackets to homeless people. That way, they get free clothes that would keep them warm in the winter season and since they are outside all day long they wear your company T-shirts/Jackets and thus advertise your company.

I know, some of you might think as this as exploiting the homeless but I don’t see it that way. Your company can also give the homeless some gift certificates that can only be used for Food. This way, you give clothes to the homeless, gift certificates for food and your company gets advertising in return. So the homeless are working for those gift certificates and not getting them for free.

Why is a guy walking into a party with a girl more desirable to other girls than a guy entering with his guy friends?

SOCIAL PROOF: You will be amazed how far people will go to avoid the pain of thinking and brain storming. I read in an article while back that said: How well a society has modernized is directly proportional to how many daily functions a person can perform without thinking. Which does makes sense. we want everything to be automatic, we want refrigerators that should automatically recognize which grocery item is depleting and order it in advance. We want smarter TV's that should tell us which new shows to watch based on which shows we have been watching in the past.

I know you are thinking its true but what does it have to do with the title of this posting. Well here it is, one way of avoiding thinking is use social proof for certain products or people. What do I mean by that? You see TV commercials and they show a normal day to day John Doe using a product and you think, he looks like me so if he uses it, it must be right thing to do and let me try it as well. If others are doing it, them it might be the right thing to do. Thats one reason hurds of people end up investing into a stock just because its favored by majority but thats another post.

My point is, when a girl at a party (lets call her Mary) see's a guy (John) coming in with another girl (lets call her Jamie), she automatically assumes that the guy must be normal or has something special since she is with him (note that the girl does not has to be dating the guy, just her presence with the guy is influence enough). So, Mary assumes that the guy must have something on for him thats why Jamie is with him. She unconsiously looks for the social proof which comes in form of Jamie.

But if Don walks in the party with his guy friends, then he might be precieved by Mary as undesirable or at least less desirable than John since he is coming by himself, no girl then maybe something wrong with him that no one wants him.

The social proof provided by Jamie to Mary saves Mary time and pain to think and try to see if the guy is really good or not. Her assumption that since Jamie is with John, he must be something and that what I want it too. So even at subconscious levels Mary feels attracted towards John with minimal efforts from John.

Ladies, am I right or am I right?

This methodology is used by advertisers and businesses to attract more customers into buying their products. Main Idea behind it: If I see someone like me trying that product and enjoying it, it must be good so let me try it as well. eg: all informercials, sandwich makers ads, magic bullet commercial, Mac VS PC Ads, etc.

Can the ease of availability of "borrowed" copy of your company's software increase your profits?

I was having lunch with few of my friends today and we all are big Apple Inc. fans, we love the iPods and iPhones and have'em both and some of us even have 2 of them. During the conversation one of my friends mentions that he wants to buy a Macbook but only reason he has been debating on it for more than a year is because he will have to pay for every additional software that he will buy in the future. Because there are barely any "borrowed" copies of the any of Apple's software available out there.

Now I know what you are thinking, this guy is talking about "borrowed" software and its wrong blah blah but lets face it, thats the reality. We see more and more people running "borrowed" software copies out there than those companies would want. I am all about the open source and believe all software should be free to the consumer but that's for another blog entry.

Any how, this conversation got me thinking that maybe the "ease" with which these "borrowed" copies of Microsoft software's is out there, is it actually helping Microsoft, HP, Sony, Dell etc. make money.

My theory says, Yes.

And, here's why. An average John Doe has $1500-$1800 that he wants to spend on computer. He is debating either to buy Apple (which he likes due to sleek design and its sexiness) or buy HP/Dell etc with Microsoft Operating System.

On average a laptop would last him about 4-5 years. Here's what goes in his mind while making a decision: If I buy Apple, the laptop is great, love the operating system and software that it comes with but what if I need additional software during next 4-5 years, I would have to buy every piece and on average the cost runs around at least $200 (I know I am low balling it but lets give the benefit of doubt). So, within next 4 years, if I need 4 more softwares (any kind even from different vendor), I am looking at $800-$1000 in costs. WOW

On the other hand, if I get a HP or Sony or Dell laptop, then there is a very good chance that I would be able to get any "borrowed" copies of most of the windows compatible software I would need in the future and save those $800. Savings.

So, decision is made, lets use Microsoft OS based laptop and even though he would have loved Apple Macbook its just not cost effective.

This is just one example but I am sure lot of people who might have gone thru similar thinking cycle and came out with a decision to purchase Microsoft based products.

Now if you are Microsoft, does the availability is "borrowed" copies out there really affecting your sales negatively? Looks like it is converting customers for you just made a sale for you and your hardware manufacturers.

Don't ever say you will do your BEST.

When faced with a challenge, I never say I will do my best because then it constrains me and you shouldn’t either. What we think is our “best,” is based on our evaluation of our past accomplishments. It’s a collection of successes and failures, which subconsciously creates a boundary in our mind that defines what our best is. So, when you are faced with a new challenge, your mind replays your success/failure video and tells you that when you encountered a new type of challenge in the past, your success rate was so and so when you did you “best”. Therefore, for this new challenge, your “best” effort will result in this type of outcome (based on your past subconscious evaluation).

So what should you do or say to yourself when faced with new challenge? I don’t know what you should do or say to yourself, but this is what works for me. When faced with new challenge, I go all out. I jot down what needs to be done and then go out and do it. I know it sounds simple, but it works for me.

I don’t give up unless the task at hand is finished, which means, I keep going even if I have failed numerous times and even when my “best” effort tells me that “you put in your best and it can’t be done so lets move on.” I go out and try it one more time. Because every problem in this world has a solution and it is on and in you, if you can move beyond the restrains of your “best” efforts to find the solution.

Emotional Mirroring: I can feel what you are thinking

Anthony Robbins once said, Emotion is controlled by Motion. If you want to change your current state of mind (aka your emotion) change your physical bodily motion. If you want to feel happy, put a big smile on your face and that simple act of smiling will trigger neurological activity in your brain and you will begin to feel pleasant.

Our facial expressions, partially, trigger within us the feelings we display
we can simulate any feeling by intentionally setting up our facial muscle for that feeling.

Edgar Allan Poe had an intuitive grasp of this principle. He wrote, when I wish to find out how good or wicked a person is or what are his thoughts at that moment, I try to mimic the expression onto my face as accurately in accordance to the expression on his face and wait to see what thoughts and sentiments arise in my own heart as to match and correspond the expression. Daniel Goleman discusses similar views in this book Social Intelligence and refers it as "Emotional Mirroring".

If you are at work, meeting with your boss, coworker or a date or meeting someone for the first time and want to get a "feeling" of what they are thinking or feeling about you, try the Edgar Allan Poe's technique. Mimic their facial expressions and see what first few feelings arise in your mind and heart. It could give you an edge when it comes to reading people in business or in your day to day life.

Similarly, if your face radiates confidence, happiness, boldness, passion, love, care it would trigger those feelings in the person standing in front of you even if they are unaware. And they will notice at subconscious level the emotion you radiate by your facial expression.